Tuesday, April 20, 2010


I am to reflect on the following topic for english class, or my teacher will break my legs...

"Disillusion is a common experience of growing up. We find that people in the adult world whom we once idealized are less than ideal, and that situations we considered innocent are actually corrupt. How do people encountering the "real world" for the first time handle these discoveries?"

It’s common for kids growing up to realize that some things aren’t as they appear. Since birth we have most of our ethical choices handled for us. But this is from a small pool of choices and doesn’t compare to the ones we have to make as we grow up. Of course, this larger pool of choices I refer to wouldn’t be a problem if we didn’t have to start making them ourselves, but we do. It’s like getting one, and JUST one, ride around the block with the training wheels on our bike. Then, off with the training wheels and in to heavy traffic. There is no slow or steady transition in to the real world. As a matter of fact, we don’t even get a heads up. We’re just thrusted in to life without any warning.
This is usually a very scary and emotional time for young people and some are lucky enough to only have that. Many others though, don’t have it as good. When it turns out that your parents lied to you about being non smokers, or about your dad being your real dad, or about your whole life being a TV show, it can be rather earth shattering for people who have never known an alternative reality. An entire belief system built upon that of your parents is ready to collapse with the slightest screw up. This no doubt causes loads of stress for the parents who could later on question their own judgment for fear of screwing up, but I’m not reflecting on that so shut up. I’m reflecting on the mind blowing realizations we make as we grow up.
We spend our whole lives looking to others, trying to find someone strong to put our faith in, because we can’t stand the pressure of making our own choices. We want someone else to do it for us. Like atlas holding up the earth’s weight, just waiting for the split second we can relax. Some of us make the mistake of being impatient and toss our trust in the hands of anyone. These people are doomed to have their trust go from one person to another until they just don’t believe in anyone anymore. These are the casualties in life. Then there are the others who learn that they just have to grab the reigns and do their best. And some just don’t do anything. These people tend to excel at World of Warcraft.
One way or another, we all learn that, despite what we believed when we were young, times have changed and we have to choose which way we go eventually. There is no compass in life, no matter how badly you want one there. There is no direction or map or trail. There are no patterns and no trustworthy people. Even our parents are subject to questionable behavior sometimes. The best thing that we can do is try to prevent this from governing who we are in life and instead make conscious, aware decisions because in the end it’s just you against the world. RIP Tupac.

P.s. Ive decided that instead of going on and on about how julie london should have been born in the nineties and have a locker next to mine, i am going to instead just post whatever i was listening to while writing my blog at the bottom of each page.


The Stills
Timber Timbre


  1. you need to really jerk off more...

  2. We never forgive
    We never forget