Today I woke up to a tapping at my window. I feel like Edgar Allan Poe. Initially, I wrote off the tapping as raindrops being blown off the roof and landing on my window, seeing as there were only five or six taps at a time. But after a few more taps it struck me that the tapping was in the same spot every time. Well, this called for investigation. Expecting to see a tree branch or squirrel at my window, I pulled apart my curtains and jumped back in shock from what I saw…a fuck. A fuck had been tapping on my window all morning. Did it want something? Was it lost? I don’t know, but as soon as I made eye contact with the fuck, who was equally as surprised as I was, it started slowly waddling backwards, almost as though to say, “Whoa dude. My bad, wrong house…”
Anyways, after coming to my senses I ran to the kitchen for bread so that I could feed my unexpected guest. I grabbed a slice of bread off. It was an end piece because nobody in my family likes that part, thus making it the most expendable. When I returned, however, I couldn’t see the fuck anywhere. It had left, just like that. Im not sure if it had to do with the bugs bunny plushie laying on my bed or the fucks natural disposition towards rabbits…and there hunting season, but either way, the fuck was gone. Regardless, I opened my window and threw out some torn up pieces of bread in hopes that it would return. It still hasn’t, but tomorrow is another day so heres hoping.
I cant explain why im so excited about this fuck, but I really want it to come back. I think about making friends with it by slowly earning its trust with small food offerings and eventually building a friendship. I told my friend ana how I felt about the fuck and she said it was just sad, which is true, but ill explain my feelings anyways. See, life’s been getting me down lately. Work sucks so every time I finish im left in a bad mood, but I don’t have any friends to go to cause theyre all tied up with school, and its not like I have a girlfriend cause im too busy with other things like…lego and shit…anyways, all of this has left me feeling lonely and depressed lately. But then, out of nowhere, heres this fuck that just comes tapping into my life…and…I don’t know…I guess I just feel like life would be a little bit better if I knew that this fuck was looking forward to seeing me everyday because being able to make this fuck happy and knowing that im important to someone would make me happy…so if youre reading this…please come back to my window tomorrow. It’s the bottom left one with the Buddha statuette in it. Ill be waiting with an entire loaf of bread…
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