Christmas shopping can be so frustrating when you don’t get to see or talk to the people that expect heartfelt, thoughtful presents from you. Its late and I have work in the morning but I haven’t written a blog for a while so ill make this short and sweet.
After asking several different people for Christmas gift ideas only to hear “gift cards are your friend” from all of them, I decided I should write a blog about why this is not an appropriate solution for my problems.
Gift giving is an arduous task that is split up between three groups of people: children, adults, and old people.
The first group is children. Children range from about 5-16 years old and are expected to be creative and to make something at home with the help of an adult due to a lack of finance. An example of this is the ever so common “Macaroni Christmas Card”
The second group is adults. Adults fall anywhere between the ages of 17-65 and are generally held up to the highest gift giving standard. This means that gifts have to be both thoughtful and have to be worth something. Of course, many adults are exempt from this rule if they aren’t working, but this just ends up manifesting in to a dinner table conversation on why you’re so irresponsible and don’t have a job yet at this point in your life. Most of the time, one must suffer through decades of this process before achieving the rank of “old person”
The third, and most coveted category, is old person. Old people fall anywhere above the age of 65 and typically don’t have to give a shit what you think of them or their gift giving abilities. Old people usually dont have the stamina necessary to walk around a mall for hours picking out the perfect gift for everyone on their list and have the excuse of tired muscles and aching joints to back them up, thus making this is the only category where gift cards and cash are acceptable. Those who feel younger and more energetic may embark on a journey to the mall for gift cards, but eventually they all end up just giving out cash.
This is why im not aloud to use gift cards and this is why I hate my age group.